THE LAST HOPE FOR THE LATE LATE SHOWTHE LAST HOPE FOR THE LATE LATE SHOW

When he took over the Late Late Show on CBS, smarmy night time talk show host, Craig Kilborn was America's newest sweetheart. Five years on and he's gone and if you've seen the series of reprobates that have been standing in while CBS figures things out, well. Collectively and individually with a special mention for Adam Corolla , they confirm that Craig will be sorely missed. Who'd have thought it...

Of the guests you've had on you're new show, which would you most want to spend time with?:
I would've said Jenna Elfman, but I saw her again at some awards show - I had a little buzz, she seemed buzzed and it wasn't working. I have a good thing with Janeane Garofalo - She's been on the show three times already. Hanging out with her might ruin it though.

I've read that Janeane has said she's had sexy dreams about you.
I don't talk about my personal life, including my sex dreams, so we'll never know whether I reciprocate. There are times when I'd like to curl up with her, sure, but I'll never admit to that.

Don't worry, we won't. When Yasmine Bleeth was on, she called you "cute." So why are you single?
I'm seeing someone right now. I don't want to say it's no big deal, because that'll hurt her feelings. But it's no big deal. (laughs) I'd like to find an Ivy League graduate, someone low-maintenance, tall and...an I say "slender," or is that sexist? That's okay? Can I say "anorexic?"

When you were on ESPN, what used to be your favorite sports cliche?
Easy: "On the boards, he does a yeoman's job." What the hell is that? What's a yeoman?

Okay, Craig, are you ready for Five questions?
I'm ready.

Question 1: You're from Minnesota, and so is Bob Mould of Husker Du fame who recorded the original theme music for your old Daily Show on Comedy Central. Name the best Husker Du album.
Oh God almighty.I'm gonna go off the board and say when he was with Sugar.

Any Sugar album. Name one.
I can't . . . "Sugar?"

Name a Husker Du album.
Am I allowed to make one phone call?

You're oh for one.

Question two: Name the most annoying show on your old network.
I'd hardly call Comedy Central a "network," but my answer will be any show with a watermelon and a mallet. Yes - Gallagher.

I also would have accepted "Win Ben Stein's Money." You're one for two.

Question three: In what year did the NBA introduce the three-point shot?
Oh fuck! I wanted you to say the twenty-four-second clock, which was 1954-55. Um.was it 1984-85?

No. 1979-80.
Mmm, wasn't even close. That's embarrassing. I do want to say that I love the NBA though.

You're one for three.

Question 4: Playboy or Penthouse?
Penthouse is disgusting. So it has to be Playboy, which is tasteful, or else the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit issue.

No, I'm sorry. You forgot who you were interviewing with. The Orange Voice answer is Penthouse.
You're sick.

Okay, I'll give it to you for having a strong opinion.

Try to finish strong. On a scale of one to ten, how much Dennis Miller do you have in you?
Two. The comparisons ended a long time ago. I've chatted with him, and he said, "You have the same sensibility, because you make me laugh, but you don't sound like me." I'm a smart-ass, but I don't hear the comparisons.

Grading leniently, I'll give it to you. You finish three of five.
I'm so upset about missing the NBA question. Can I have another one? Can you say I got it right?

Craig Kilborn can't be seen on The Late Late Show on CBS every weeknight at 12:35 am.

Alarcon
(biography/all stories)