search for something...

search for something you might like...

There's Something About Charlize Spanish Pantalones interviews Charlize Theron before won her Oscar

There's Something About Charlize

Spanish Pantalones interviews Charlize Theron before won her Oscar

by Spanish Pantalones, Editor-at-Large
first published: November, 2004

approximate reading time: minutes

Tom Hanks would hire me before some casting director for some stupid sanitary napkin ad would...

Lots of celebrities have strayed past Spanish's mic, for he is after all, the Larry King of OUTSIDELEFT. Few have charmed and entertained us as Charlize Theron. Oscar touted for her role in The Astronaut's Wife, once you learn how to pronounce her name, you never want it to be far from your lips... Keep the shoes on, Charlize!

Let's clear up the question on everyone's mind right away: What's the official pronunciation of your name?

Shar-lease Thair-en. People can't say my last name at all.

You were raised in a dorp in Benoni, South Africa. What's a dorp?

It's actually Afrikaans for "a tiny little town." I lived in farmlands, and my best friend was a goat. Kids came to school on donkeys. I had a horse, but I didn't take her to school. I was a tomboy and a glamour puss. I'd be swinging from the trees and getting all oily from trees and working as a mechanic with my dad, and then I'd go into my mom's closet and get all the gowns out and put on the high heels and put on the lipstick and pretend I was like Diana Ross.

What was it like when you moved to Milan at 16 to become a model?

I did shows and photo shoots, but I could not book a commercial. Even after I did 2 Days In The Valley and That Thing You Do, I was still going out for commercials, 'cause I was poor as hell. Ton Hanks would hire me before some casting director for some stupid sanitary napkin would. How sad is that?

Work is work I suppose. You've lived on both sides of the U.S. The question stands: East or West?

When I was studying ballet with the Joffery in New York, it was a little hard for me. The traffic, the amount of people, everything just stank of urine, and there's not a tree anywhere, the birds are just like depressed. I moved to LA about 5 years ago, and from the first day, I felt very much at home, (laughs) because I'm blond, I have fake lips, and I have big boobs. I swear to God, at the premiere for 2 Days, this guy came up to me and said, "I'm Dr. So-and-So. Who did your lips?" And I was like, "You must be a great fucking doctor to think I have collagen-injected lips when I don't."

Don't be offended by this next question, but in 2 Days, you explored the use of ice cubes during sex. Have you ever done that in real life?

(laughs) What kind of question is that? I think I've kissed with ice in my mouth! But no, no guy has ever iced his family jewels like James Spader did in that movie.

Is there anything better than an orgasm?

Apparently, it's biochemicially exactly the same as eating a large amount of chocolate. See, men wanna hear stuff like that. I can be fake and say "Oh God, no, there's nothing better than an orgasm." But you know what? A walk through Central Park will do just as well.

But I thought you said you kinda hated New York and all its trappings...

OK then, Santa Monica's boardwalk.

Have you ever done it on the beach?

No. Oh, the drink? (laughs) Yes, I've had that. Candy in a glass, my friend.

Here's a toughie. In light on the MTV awards this week: Backstreet Boys or 'Nsync?

Mmmm, that is a tough one. I have to side with the Backstreet Boys though. They're a bit more on the bad boy side. That little blond boy is kind of a heartbreaker. I'm a sucker for blond guys.

I bet you've left you share of broken hearts around the world.

Not really. When I moved out here I was in a relationship for about a year, and it kinda ended a short time ago. It's not fair for me to lead anybody on, because I just don't have too much time right now. I'm working. If I had any time to scratch my ass, I would.

Your bio says you learned to speak like an American by watching the Love Boat and Dallas. What American customs mystify you?

The US Customs agents (laughs). Those people just really boggle my mind. They actually get to go home and say "Hey Honey, I got to give a South African chick a lot of shit and deport her!" Last year I went home to South Africa, and the return trip to New York took 24 hours. Six hours later, they put me on a flight back. I said, do you know that I'm doing a movie with Johnny Depp? They were like, "Whatever. Get on the plane, lady."

I hear that movie (The Astronaut's Wife) could be up for Oscar contention. What do you think?

Ha-ha! I wouldn't go that far. It's good, but that's stretching it a bit. I do get to be in a film with Johnny Depp though and that was pretty cool. I'm very, very lucky. I've been doing so much press for it these past few weeks, it's totally fucking exhausting. I'm ten minutes late for a E! [Television] interview for it. I'm gonna have to haul ass pretty soon. (laughs) My mother is always saying, "Watch the language, young lady." For some reason, I love profanity, especially the phrase, "Fuck me."

Is that an expression of disbelief or a command?

It just depends on the situation I guess.

Spanish Pantalones
Editor-at-Large

As employee #3, Spanish has worked for OUTSIDELEFT in some capacity since day one. As our editor-at-large, Spanish now calls ‘the road’ home, filing articles about the arts, leisure, and culture when the wi-fi works.


about Spanish Pantalones »»

upcoming interviews begin with Fliss Kitson, Mick Mercer and Moose McKillop

RECENT STORIES

RANDOM READS

All About and Contributors

HELP OUTSIDELEFT

Outsideleft exists on a precarious no budget budget. We are interested in hearing from deep and deeper pocket types willing to underwrite our cultural vulture activity. We're not so interested in plastering your product all over our stories, but something more subtle and dignified for all parties concerned. Contact us and let's talk. [HELP OUTSIDELEFT]

WRITE FOR OUTSIDELEFT

If Outsideleft had arms they would always be wide open and welcoming to new writers and new ideas. If you've got something to say, something a small dank corner of the world needs to know about, a poem to publish, a book review, a short story, if you love music or the arts or anything else, write something about it and send it along. Of course we don't have anything as conformist as a budget here. But we'd love to see what you can do. Write for Outsideleft, do. [SUBMISSIONS FORM HERE]

WRITERS thru' the Years

A.I. House-Painter, Agata Makiela, Alan Devey, Alan Rider, Alex V. Cook, Ancient Champion, Andy Allison, Annemiek, Archibald Stanton, Becca Kelly, Belle Plankton, Bruce Bailey, Caiomhin Millar, Cassie Thomas, Chantal, Cheiron Coelho, Chris Connolly, Christian Present, Damon Hayhurst, Dan Breen, Danny Rose, David Hackney, David O'Byrne, Denni Boyd, Dirty Lillie, DJ Fuzzyfelt, Dr. Rich, Dr. Richard Bennett, Duncan Jones, Emily Moore, Erin, Erin Pipes, Erin Scott, Gracey Babs, Graham Baker, Guilaine Arts, H.xx, Hamilton High, Henderson Downing, Holly Martins, J. Charreaux, J.Lee, Jay Lewis, Jaycentee, Jennifer Lynn, Jenny McCann, Jeremy Gluck, Jez Collins, Joe Ambrose, John Robinson, Jonathan Thornton, Julie O, Karl Morgan, Katherine Pargeter, Kelsey Osgood, Kevin McHugh, Kiah Cranston, Kleo Kay, Lake, Lauren Frison, Lee Paul, Lilly Pemberton, Luke Skinner, Malcolm, Marek Pytel, Mark Piggott, Martin Devenney, Meave Haughey, Melanie Surfleet, Michelle Williams, Mickey, Mike Fox, mindy strouse, Neil Campbell, Neil Scott, Ogglypoogly, OL House Writer, Pam, Paul Burns, Paul Hawkins, Paul Mortimer, Paul Quigley, Peter Williams, Pixie McMowat, Pixievic, Rene Williams, Richard John Walker, Rick Casson, Rikki Stein, Ronan Crinion, Rowena Murphy, Ruby Lake, Ryan 'RJO' Stewart, Samantha Charles, Seth Sherwood, Shane O'Reilly, Sheridan Coyle, Sofia Ribeiro Willcox, Sophia Satchell-Baeza, Spanish Pantalones, Speedie John, Spencer Kansa, Steve McCarthy, The Conversation, Tim London, Tim Sparks, Tony Fletcher, Toon Traveller, Trevi, Urs Lerch, Wayne Dean-Richards, and founders, Alarcon & Lamontpaul

OUTSIDELEFT UNIVERSE

Outsideleft Night Out with The Swaps
OUTSIDELEFT Night Out
weekend

outsideleft content is not for everyone