If God Had Meant For Us To Work He Would Have Given Us Jobs

When Al Likilla sends a message, the intended should take some heed

by Hamilton High,
first published: September, 2011

"I was researching what a 15 year-old would call the police. Is it 'fizz' or something? I can't keep up with it." - PD James

Okays, so unlike most of the rest of the popular media in the world somehow we manage to generally ignore press releases. It's a shame, because, that's a great world, the world according to PR Shamans. I mean, we love them but. However, when we get Al Likilla's missive's we're intrigued, we're happy and we want to share, so here's his trailer for the Fall edition of his online magazine, Home Defence... Thanks Al!

Welcome everyone, to the start-of-Autumn Home Defence update, featuring the latest hot reports from your favoured Paranoia and Lifestyle Webzine!

This time out, following a Summer of proper pillaging, we start with a Post-Riots News Round Up

And in response to everything going a bit wrong in the UK, there's an exclusive statement from the Prime Minister on our home page

Archibald Scamp gives you his top ten ways of retaining the will to live during the LibDem Party Conference.

In Celebrity News we uncover a strange Internet suicide pact

The Conservative Party expands overseas, that's in International News

While our Classic LPs series features Americana trailblazer, Eileen Rose

And Harry Figgis delves into the murky world of Welfare to Work contracts

Finally, bad news for takeaway delivery boys everywhere, in our Special Report

That's your lot for now. Until next time, this is Al Likilla telling you to just keep repeating it to yourself; all the bad seeds are now in prison. Al

Al Likilla
Editor & Co-Creator
HomeDefenceUK.com - Paranoia & Lifestyle Webzine

Hamilton High

Hamilton High was born on Doheny Ave in the gutter, is a poet, writer and observer of popular culture. Likes fashion and cares less for style. He's on the move, he's an alter ego and we hardly ever hear from him.
about Hamilton High »»

FREE TICKETS for OUTSIDELEFT's QUIET NIGHT OUT
featuring RM FRANCIS, KERRY HADLEY-PRYCE, JAY LEWIS, WAYNE DEAN-RICHARDS and WOODENHAND»»

"I was researching what a 15 year-old would call the police. Is it 'fizz' or something? I can't keep up with it." - PD James

The Totally Random Read →

AVAILABLE NOW: RM Francis - The Chain Coral Chorus (Playdead Press)

In 2020 R.M. Francis became Poet in Residence for the Black Country Geological Society.

This book is a record of his deep time explorations of the region and his unearthing of an everyday sublime and terrestrial animism.

Available Now »»

the weekly guide to new releases

see it here every week →

10 clickable things

☉ Denim ☉ Why a portrait artist from Ireland started making comics about U.S. police brutality ☉ Warner Bros Prop Archive ☉ Hollyweed Sign ☉ What can elephants, birds, and flamenco players teach a neuroscientist-composer about music? ☉ BOYCOTT University Challenge ☉ Bruce's Beach. Reparations really, or what? (NYT) ☉ Drag Shows are banned ☉ QPR: Promotion push to relegation fight, 474,000 a week losses and a rescue mission ☉ How to talk like a Chelsea coach ☉

RECENT STORIES

In A Landscape

The continuing journey of Craven Faults

This House

Another downpayment from Wayne Dean-Richards' It's a Mad World But Funny

The Sunday Poet: Philip Larkin

Jay gets ready for the Spring Bank Holiday with a poetry reading

Outsideleft Week in Music: The Inner Space Sounds from Way Out!

We're hearing from... Inner Space Quartet, Kid brunswick, Erland Cooper, Suicide, Josienne Clarke, 3l3d3p, Seerr, Creep Show, Hannah Peel, Foo Fighters, Tanlines, The Holy Family, Little Dragon, Eduard Artemiev, Oleg Buloshkin, Edison Denisov, Sofia Gubaidulina, Alfred Schnittke, Squid, ABC, NOIR, Joe Perry & Henge

Songs of Solitude and Singularity

Josienne Clarke's remarkable songbook, revisited

It's Rock'n'Roll Suicide

Suicide's Way of Life

Many Happy Returns

ABC revisit their audacious pop masterpiece.

Things I Overheard at Cruel World 2023

Oh, the things you'll hear people talking about in Pasadena

Teethgraters: The Records RM Francis would go to the Ends of the Earth to Never Hear Again

RM Francis Week in Outsideleft concludes in the time honoured way - with a little hate for the music that irritates...

Bender (1984)

The Sunday Morning Poet

Adventures in the archives

MUSIC
CULTURE
LIT
SCREENS
PRODUCT
SSH

RANDOM READS

Tav Falco's Up To Something Else

One of our favorite performers, Tav Falco and his band The Panther Burns aer having a busy summer in France
June 2008

Mad About the Boy

September 2005

Outsideleft Week in Music starring The Steens

We're hearing from The Steens, Aitch & Bakar, Liminanas, Wire, G. Love, Beyonce, piri & tommy, Regressive Left, Norma Jean Bell, Flo Milli, Christine McVie and Bartees Strange
June 2022

Outsider of the Week - Heath K.

July 2005

Robotic Giraffes and Other Tall Stories...

Shirts off to David Beckham, (above) he's back in the World Cup.
June 2006

Outsideleft Week In Music - The Stop Everything You're Doing... It's Asha Puthli and others...

We're hearing from... Asha Puthli, Killer Mike, Yard Act ft. Elton John, Sufjan Stevens, Rae Morris, Morrissey, KOKOKO!, The Wedding Present, Guided By Voices, Loyle Carner, Metric, Bijean, Margaret Glaspy, Walker Brigade, Humour and Viagra Boys
July 2022

All About and Contributors

HELP OUTSIDELEFT

Outsideleft exists on a precarious no budget budget. We are interested in hearing from deep and deeper pocket types willing to underwrite our cultural vulture activity. We're not so interested in plastering your product all over our stories, but something more subtle and dignified for all parties concerned. Contact us and let's talk. [HELP OUTSIDELEFT]

WRITE FOR OUTSIDELEFT

If Outsideleft had arms they would always be wide open and welcoming to new writers and new ideas. If you've got something to say, something a small dank corner of the world needs to know about, a poem to publish, a book review, a short story, if you love music or the arts or anything else, write something about it and send it along. Of course we don't have anything as conformist as a budget here. But we'd love to see what you can do. Write for Outsideleft, do. [SUBMISSIONS FORM HERE]

WRITERS thru' the Years

Alan Devey, Alan Rider, Alex V. Cook, Ancient Champion, Andy Allison, Annemiek, Belle Plankton, Bruce Bailey, Caiomhin Millar, Chantal, Cheiron Coelho, Chris Connolly, Christian Present, Damon Hayhurst, Dan Breen, David Hackney, Denni Boyd, Dirty Lillie, DJ Fuzzyfelt, Dr. Rich, Dr. Richard Bennett, Duncan Jones, Erin, Erin Pipes, Erin Scott, Gracey Babs, Graham Baker, Guilaine Arts, H.xx, Hamilton High, Henderson Downing, Holly Martins, J. Charreaux, Jay Lewis, Jaycentee, Jennifer Lynn, Jenny McCann, Jeremy Gluck, Jez Collins, Joe Ambrose, John Robinson, Julie O, Karl Morgan, Katherine Pargeter, Kelsey Osgood, Kevin McHugh, Lake, Lee Paul, Luke Skinner, Malcolm, Marek Pytel, Mark Piggott, Meave Haughey, Michelle Williams, Mike Fox, mindy strouse, Neil Campbell, Neil Scott, Ogglypoogly, OL House Writer, Pam, Paul Hawkins, Paul Quigley, Peter Williams, Pixie McMowat, Pixievic, Rene Williams, Rick Casson, Ronan Crinion, Ruby Lake, Ryan 'RJO' Stewart, Samantha Charles, Seth Sherwood, Shane O'Reilly, Sheridan Coyle, Sofia Ribeiro Willcox, Sophia Satchell-Baeza, Spanish Pantalones, Speedie John, Spencer Kansa, Steve McCarthy, The Conversation, Tim London, Tim Sparks, Toon Traveller, Wayne Dean-Richards, and founders, Alarcon & Lamontpaul