approximate reading time: minutes
Tony Valentino
Dirty Water Revisited
(Big Stir)
‘lovers muggers and thieves - oh, very cool people’
If Wikipedia can be believed Tony Valentino is 82 years old. A man with two immaculate names (born Emilio Bellissimo) he is also blessed with some amazing vocal chords - no, hold on, that’s not him, it’s the drummer, Duane Waider, who is a sprightly 63 years old who also plays drums on this strange collection that, somehow has something all its own, neither pastiche, nor, obviously the sounds of the snotty drag racing pointy booted speed freaks (just guessing) they once were. LA punks, hah!
Tony Valentino plays guitar (very well, still) and harmonica and sings the final track on the album, Love Me, that manages to be both a Pogues-like romp and and grandpa Simpson confusing his nurse for his teenage sweetheart.
Alright, low shot. Ageist as fuck. As an old git myself I think it’s got to be acknowledged - still making noise like this when, by all sane reckoning you are properly old is not just remarkable, it’s also funny.
It’s actually a total freaky situation, coming up against the snowdrift (again) of pop culture’s dead end; zombified, not going anywhere, and old people making as much of a racket as their great grand kids. What does this mean? There surely must be a sociologist around to explain. No, they’re too busy swilling French Blues around in a diuretic solution and hoping it won’t affect the Viagra. So let’s take a guess - a long life of rocknroll excess set against the increasing life expectancy delivered via the second world war’s long lasting commercial boost plus antibiotics for a select group of world citizens (AKA Americans) means this is an inevitable situation.
I’m looking forward to the various genres getting to the same point, particularly the gangstas (those that survive - it could be argued they’re not real gangstas if they survive that long - couldn’t it? I don’t know, it’s all new territory) and the skate punks. And Cher…
There are a few original tracks on this, as well as the aforementioned Love Me, including the hilarious I’m A Sexy Punk Rocker which features the following:
‘refugees in overcoats
safety pins in leather coats
it’s still 79 in my mind’
Suddenly 1979 seems like a verrrrry long time ago.