The Ballad of Speedball Baby: A Memoir
Ali Smith
(Blackstone Publishing)
When I started to type out this review, auto correct changed ‘Ballad’ to ’Bladder’, which may very well be prescient, as one of Ali Smith (Bassist, Writer, Photographer, Chronicler, Observer of Life par excellence)’s concerns whilst rattling around the US and Europe in the back of a van with New York punkabilly rebels Speedball Baby was locating somewhere to pee. Its those small, yet vital, details of life in a small band attempting to claw their way up the slippery pole of musical success in the mid 90s, that make this account stand out from so many others. Boasting a Chick Lit style dayglo green cover complete with printed-on sellotape strips, ‘The Ballad of Speedball Baby’ has the perfect title, for this isn’t an attempt to glamourise or mythologise, or puff up the ego of its author, as so many of these rock biographies are. In fact, it’s not really about Speedball Baby at all. It's all about being Ali Smith in Speedball Baby. There are tales of playing crummy venues to bemused audiences, meeting mad, bad, and sometimes dangerous to know Europeans, scary experiences with humourless Croatian border guards, or escaping from seriously wasted Slovenian woodland festival goers. The enthusiasm of small-town audiences, and the genuine emotion expressed by girls in the audience when they see a girl just like them up there on stage, is notable. Even today, being a girl in a band is challenging. Then it was even more so.
That contrasted with the bland indifference of their major label, MCA. Dropped after their debut album failed to achieve Nirvana-like sales, they were picked up by Dutch label Konkurrel (home to bands with superb names like Dog Faced Hermans) who whisked them away on a chaotic tour of West and East Europe. All of that is really only the background to Ali’s story, though, which is the story of her growing up in NY, abuse from various boyfriends, her precarious existence grasping on to the lifeline that was the band and the lasting friendships formed within it, her re-visiting her Portugese family heritage whilst on tour, and sharing the insights offered by her journal entries - none of which are just about life on the road or in a band, but are everything about life itself. And that life rarely had a dull moment. Along the way she experienced bouts of what we would now call 'Imposter Syndrome', a form of depression where, however well things are going, you believe it will never last, that you are not worthy of the attention. ' The Ballad of Speedball Baby' is, however, very definitely worthy of your attention. In a different life you too could be Ali. I could be Ali. We all could be Ali.
This particular Ali is now a renowned photographer and writer, whose work is regularly featured in places like The Guardian and The New York Times. Fortuitously, she relocated from her native NY to my nearest town, Norwich, a couple of years back (and is fed up of having to explain that for her, that is not a step down!) so rest assured, we will definitely be catching up with her very soon for Outsideleft.
Essential Information: 'The Ballad of Speedball Baby' is available now from all good online and real bookshops, and probably a few bad ones too.
Main image: Speedball Baby. Photo credit: Monk Parker
